Russian Roulette, etc.

There is a game that young men sometimes play that is a very bad game, but is attractive, for it lets them goad each other into "proving" they have no fear of death.

It's called Russian Roulette. Amazingly, that game is still actually played, in Colleges and in the Military. For those unfamiliar with it, you take a six shot revolver, and put one bullet in it. Then you spin the cylinder and snap it closed without looking to see if the bullet is primed to fire, or if pulling the trigger will make the hammer fall on an empty chamber.

Obviously, you have a one out of six chance of blowing your head off, when you then aim at your own head and pull the trigger.

I'm afraid of a pointless death, so I was not interested in playing the first time I was exposed to this game in the Air Force. So I quickly came up with a variation that turned people off from playing it for real.

I knew I couldn't just refuse, so instead I took the gun first, and said, "I want to play a game called, Who Would Have Died If They'd Been Dumb Enough To Pull The Trigger!", I span the cylinder, pointed it at the floor, and said, "It would have been X's turn and I can see that he'd have lived." (I then showed the gun so they could see the round wasn't in the spot that would have been next.)

I span it again, aimed down, named the next person, and said the same thing. Then the third time, I named the person, and said, "Oh...and he would have died. I guess this is where we'd all call it an evening?" The twitchy sicko who suggested the game wasn't pleased, but I knew most everyone else was relieved at being released from the game without having to confess "cowardice".

For the knowing of the name of the person who'd have died ended all the silly macho talk about who was "brave" enough to play Russian Roulette. I think in the main, these games always get proposed by someone who usually either doesn't intend to go first, or has such issues that he doesn't care if he dies. Then young males who should know better, emotionally badger each other into it for not wishing to look like the only "coward", when in truth, everyone there is probably hoping that someone will give them an out!

In the ordinary course of things, the "out" comes when someone must degrade themselves by point blank refusing. Thus looking the coward. I prefer to make the person who originally proposed the game look stupid for suggesting it instead.

Russian Roulette is so much more common then I would have thought. Four times in my life that game has come up, I wouldn't have thought it would have even come up once. When I was older and more confident, I'd not bother with the elaborate ruse, but just say, "You dumb fucks die if you want, I'm going to be a pussy and get a beer!" which usually gets a laugh, and a quick chorus of "me, toos"!

People are so easily led. But there are always so many more twitches looking to lead though.

I played my version of the game with my sons, when they were 16 and 14. I like to tell, show and/or do all the stupid things with my kids first, that way they can associate it with their nerdy dad, and it won't have as much incentive for them! It takes the mystery out of stuff, too.

Funny, my son who went into the Army never encountered the game, but it was my younger son (then 16) who came home to tell me that someone had tried to get everyone to play the game over at a friend's house. And he'd grabbed the gun and did what I said before it could get out of hand. And he'd afterward taken the round out, and hid the gun from his tipsy buddies. (Alcohol almost always comes before that game.)

I told him he did good, then I went to the bathroom and got sick. I felt that I'd just won a game of Russian Roulette, for the odds did not favor me having ever met my sons (adopted), let alone telling them of that game.

I always think parents should go over all the many stupid things kids and young folk do, like drugs and guns and such. But in a realistic way, that lets them have more ways of dealing with a thing then "Just saying no", and more reasons to not do a thing then "Dad saying no".

Like not telling lies about pot and alcohol, when we know damn well it's harmless. Let them get drunk at home and at friend's houses, they'll bore of it soon enough, and build a tolerance in the meanwhile. Teach them the real dangers of pot, such as living in your paren'ts basement at the age of 25, or getting raped in prison because our government is so tyrannical.

And show them actual crack addicts. I took them to a 2nd Avenue crack whore (this in Fairbanks, 2nd Ave, is where the crime stuff is, at night) and asked her what all she'd do for $10. She had a lot of things to suggest to who she thought of as just three random guys. When she ran out of suggestions, I asked if she knew any guy who'd join in, and she said yes. I thanked her for her time, and my kids and I left her there with the ten bucks paid for her time and trouble.

I explained to my sons on the way home that cocaine and crack were really, really fun. (Remember, don't lie, or you lose credibility) I told them it was like Russian Roulette though. Many people could handle it, but many could not. And that it wasn't a matter of how smart you were, it was just luck of the genetic draw. And if they tried it, and they were the type to be addicted, they'd be on the corner next to her.

They are 18 and 20 now, and I know they've had opportunity to use since they were 16 and 14 and I showed them that "lady". I've also taken them to homeless shelters where I played "Spot the Junkie" with them.

Kids need to see the real dangers of things. They need to hear the real truth. It's the parent's responsibility.

Dean West